Sunday, March 19, 2006

The trauma of the green....

Am I the only mom that had NO IDEA it was St. Patrick's Day last Friday until about 10 minutes before school? Gulp. My mom and dad always did fun things on the holidays and I remember more then one green meal on St. Patrick's day. I decided to make a green dinner and start the tradition in our home. I have seen other blogs where the moms serve actual green food....broccoli, grapes, peas and the like. I just did it the lazy way and used food coloring.

Lauren fell asleep during the afternoon (my first clue) and didn't wake up until I had our dinner on the table. She came up to the table to see her green macaroni and cheese with peas, toast w/ green butter and of course, shamrock milk. There was even a note from O'Malley, the classroom leprechaun, telling her that he had sprinkled lucky leprechaun dust on her food. Cool mom, right? I ran upstairs to get the baby up (what can I say...he naps until 5:30....) and by the time I got downstairs she was quietly sobbing at the table. She wouldn't tell me what was wrong but kept crying. Her cheeks were bright red and she was clearly not well. I plopped Jacob in his high chair (but didn't do the straps....) and went to figure out what was wrong with Lulu. It seems that she didn't want to eat her green food because LAST time she ate green food, she threw up. She has eaten green food before? I may not be the most observant mom, but I am pretty sure that I haven't served green bread or cheese anytime recently, had I?

It turns out that Lauren had experience with green food. Last year, Derek and I went to NYC for a long weekend and Lulu stayed with my good friend Suzi. Suzi and Gordon have the cool parent thing down. Last year they made green waffles for the kids for dinner. Apparently, Lauren threw up all night. I tried to explain to Lauren that she threw up because she was sick, not because the waffles were green, but she wasn't buying it. She was not going to be eating that green meal (but she was mildly concerned that she would offend the leprechaun). Back to the drawing board. I went to the kitchen to make something new and realized that it was too quiet. I hadn't said "SIT DOWN JACOB" for at least 30 seconds.

Sure enough, the high chair was empty. This was not a surprise at all, because Houdini can escape from anything. More then once I have been driving down the road only to feel a small hand on my shoulder and "hiiiiii" in my ear. The boy can escape from his 5 point Britax carseat with the straps so tight they almost cut off circulation. A high chair is nothing. I have posted before about Cubby's propensity to hide in small spaces. Finding him usually involves some aggressive searching. An impromptu game of hide and seek wasn't exactly in my schedule. The good news is that it didn't take me long to find him. This is the perfect small space for him. He still feels like he is squished in somewhere AND he is in plain view. Oh, and the fact that he hadn't been fed before the great escape was no problem. By the time I found him, he was chewing on an old banana peel and some cold french fries FROM THE GARBAGE. Whatever, at least it was food.

The boy was returned to the high chair, tied down this time, and I gave HIM the green dinner. He wouldn't eat it either. This is a child that I have actually caught gnawing candy off the bottom of my shoe. This is the child that not 5 minutes before was foraging in the trash for tasty tidbits. Green macaroni was not edible to him?

Two very important lessons were learned on St. Paddy's Day at this year. The first, that we will never be having green food at our house again. The second is that toddlerhood has officially begun at our house. Excuse me while I hide all the remotes, the car keys, my wallet, the plunger...

15 comments:

Lyle said...

Bek- that is truly a delightful tale. Being a parent, I can totally underdstand your daughter's reservations for not wanting to eat the green food. When I first saw her picture for this blog, I was left wondering why she wasn't smiling. What a hoot.

While my youngest (20 months) does not do the hiding in small places, he does help us get our exercise as we try to keep up with his mischief. I keep waiting for the librarian to revoke our library card for all the pages our little tike has torn or scribbled upon. And while he has not mastered unbuckling himself from a car seat or highchair, he has the ability to climb and get into things that continually amaze me.

MAK said...

Bek-

I still won't eat Spagetti-O's since I got sick once after eating them when I was about five. Dave won't eat Banana splits for the same reason. Even though we are rational adults who realize that it was not the food, we still won't eat them!

Lily likes to crawl into drawers, too. I came home from work one day and in the course of a 10 min. conversation with Dave, he told me that Lily ate garbage and cat food!

Can't wait to see you guys! It has been too long (since the quick visit in Aug!). It will be especially fun to get Lily and Jacob together. Sounds like he can teach her a few tricks! (goody...)

Tracy M said...

Laughing and laughing (with you not at you!) and laughing...

I'm SO HAPPY that this is not only my life!! I'm never doin' green dinner again, either. No one would eat it- it was GREEN, and 2 and 4 year old boys hate GREEN food. What was I thinking???

Hey, at least Jacob didn't think your bottle of Bennedyl were PEZ!

Bek said...

MAK=

Lily will more likely teach the man cub some new tricks. Mom keeps telling me how well she can talke and mimic and how sweet and fun she is.

Jacob has only mastered picking his nose and he is JUST starting to realize that the strange sounds that come out of our mouth MEAN somthing. We can't wait to see everyone too.

more caffeine, please said...

I love this story! Your kids are so so cute. And that naughty little boy is the best. He should come play with CJ. They could paint carpet and couches and then hide with a box of Malt-o-Meal.

AzĂșcar said...

I am with your kids. Green colored food is disgusting. I am still traumatized by the green milk the PTA would bring in for St. Patrick's. I'm SORRY--it's NOT supposed to be green!!!!


Next year make corned beef and boiled potatoes with cabbage--a real Irish meal.

Betina said...

You might as well just take off the nobs at the bottom of the toilet too, those will be chewed on repeatedly until YOU feel like throwing up... at least I did!

Bek said...

Really Betina? The knobs on the bottom of the toilet? Sigh. It is good to hear from you again. How are the kiddies?

Carina....Corned beef and cabbage is one of my favorite meals...with grainy mustard. Yummmy. Too bad it takes so freaking long to make and no one will touch it but me. We will try the green food thing again next year but it will be actual food (brussle sprouts...which I LOVE, green beans, grapes, all kinds of veggies) and trust me, she will be BEGGING for green mac and cheese.

MCP...I am actually shaking at the thought of cubby and CJ in the same room at the same time. THey might merge into one giant mass of destruction (cute...but lethal) and the world would never be the same. They would give each other ideas......

compulsive writer said...

I really do love it when you post stories and photos of your kids. It reminds me of when my kids were more sweet and less obnoxious--not that I don't love them anyway.

We had two St. Patrick's day dinners. On the day of we had all the green foods (fake green for breakfast and real green for dinner)--which my kids love and would cry if they missed. Then on Sunday I finally had time to make my first try at corned beef and cabbage. We also had more green food with that. No one would eat the corned beef except my husband--who was the reason I made it in the first place--the kids all thought it wasn't done.

My theory, a good shamrock sugar cookie with green frosting will make up for any green dining faux pas.

La Yen said...

I am laughing so hard that two drops of pee just escaped...

Lorien said...

the knobs on the toilet bolts made great little sippy cups at our house. For what? toilet water, of course. YAAARRRGH!

christopher clark said...

I love that he can get out of his car seat and say "Hiiii!" Owen used to do that and we'd pull over and he'd quick and jump to the very back of the car up by the back window and squirm--it would take us forever to wrangle him back in. . . thanks for bringing back the good memories.
Lisa

Julie said...

Love the stories - the green food and your escape artist!

Virenda said...

Oh girl I feel your pain, I have 3 girls and my youngest is 3 and she's just barely getting it. Oh and green food is nasty I remember my mom trying to do that and it made me sick, lol. Green mashed potatoes to this day, make me wanna cry. ~sigh~

Bek said...

Hi Virenda..

I have lurked at your blog for EVER. You and the girls at "go fug yourself" give me my combined celebrity gossip/make fun of celebrities reading every day. It is the perfect combination: better than chocolate and peanut butter, better than pebbled ice...better than TIVO.....well, not as good as TIVO, but close. If that is your thing....go check out her site. You will giggle for sure....

It is official, no more green mashed potatoes.......