HOME and Happy 4th

Hi everyone,

After traveling for 2 days, I MADE it home. I even got some sleep last night. My son won't look at me or talk to me (he just shakes his head..."no"....like I offended him). That might change when he see's me this morning. He a daddy bonded in a huge way.

I am uploading my pictures and have a travel journal that I will post soon. I will just post a few days at a time. This is my one and only journal for the trip...so if might be long.........:-)

Overall, it was a wonderful trip. It was great to see how the program is working on the ground and to get to meet the people in Africa that are working very hard to make things happen. It was WONDERFUL to meet the children and teachers that use the program and hear that all of our hard work is making a change in the lives of some of these children. Finally, it made me realize how very blessed I am to live in my home with my family. I am blessed that my children have parents who won't die anytime soon, that they have enough to eat and that they have sparkle in their eyes. For all the smiling children I saw in Africa, I saw as many blank eyes above those smiles. There is MUCH that needs to be done.

More later,
Rebecca

Kenya Calling

Hey everyone!! I found a computer and can squeeze out a few minutes. We arrived safe and sound and have already been to four schools and two orphanages.

We flew to Western Kenya today (Kissumu) and it was very amazing and humbling. The children are so beautiful and the had prepared wonderful songs and skits for us. Their voices were like a little bit of heaven...it made my soul tingle to hear them. I would have taken several of them home if I could. They all got a big kick out of seeing their photos on the digital camera!!

Tomorrow we go to Eastern Kenya for two days and then off to Uganda after that. The end of the week will be conferences with the teachers.

No one has malaria yet (smile) and be assured I will be hitting all of you up for donations when I return (smile......). Small things make huge changes here.

Love you all and hope you are all well.
R

The Dark Continent...

Hey everyone,

I am leaving tomorrow for Africa. I can't imagine that I will be more busy there then I have been trying to get ready to leave. I look forward to the plane just to be able to sit down and read a little bit. :-) The airline messed up my ticket and I just found out that I leave 12 hours earlier then I thought I did (but they upgraded me..so I can deal with it). I leave SF at 8:00 am tomorrow and will get to Kenya TWO DAYS LATER.......sheesh. I get to play tour guide for an entire day in London in between. Two red eye flights out to take care of jet lag. I will be so tired I will sleep when we get there no matter what!!!

I will not be able to post from there, I am pretty sure, but will try. I get back July 3rd, but will do a great travel journal and will post it when I get back. It is going to be nuts...our schedule is pretty tight (but we managed to squeeze in a day of Safari....).
I am going to miss my kids and husband and I am scared to fly....all the propeller planes might be a problem for me. We go on a propeller plane every day......

I can do this.

Have a great week and I'll see you all when I get back...

P.S. It was 104 degrees here today. Not good. I admire all you people who live in AZ and TX...I feel like I am going to strangle myself, with my children........it is much harder to parent in the heat. :-)

Oh, one more story. I am bringing TONS of candy w/ me (starbursts, mints, gum, etc). I don't give money to beggars, but I DO give candy and pens. Lauren saw all the bags of candy and asked me of she could have some. Before I knew it I answered "no Lulu, those are for the starving children in Africa". She answered "if they are so hungry why do they get candy before they get real food?". Touche.

Oktoberfest.....

BLOGGER WON'T LET ME ADD PHOTOS! GRRRRRRRRRRRR

I fear that by taking so long to write the story, I have made it seem more exciting then it really is........ Blogger won't let me add pictures. I have had a hard time posting this entry for the last few days too. Silly blogger.

Last Saturday we went to a BBQ. Actually, it was a 30th birthday party for my friend Jen (Hi Jen and Mathias). Their daughter Lucy is mini Lauren. White blonde hair, chubby little arms, blue eyes......oh, and Lucy LOVES Jacob, Jacob calls her Luuuuuucy......... We love those guys (hi Mathias and Jen).

Anyway, the dinner was at the home of Jen's parents. He dad is our bishop and her mother is wonderwoman (well, so is Jen...). She is a tiny woman who is friendly and talented and can cook and garden and makes everyone feel at home. She also loves my boy. When Jacob first came home, she came up to me and said "if you need a grandma for that boy, let me know...I will hold him, etc" At the time, her only granddaughter lived in San Diego. More then once she took him from us during church and saved my bacon.

The kids had a ball at the bbq. There were a few kiddie pools and we brought suits for them. The grown ups chatted and the kidd0's ran around. Jacob ruled the pool. You would have thought the child had never seen water before. He sat in the pool, with his big Buddha belly sticking out, and just smiled for hours. We finally dragged the kids out of the pool to eat (Jen made Strawberry Rhubarb pie w/ HOMEMADE puff pastry, she is amazing). Lauren ate nothing (shocker) and Jacob ate 4,000 pieces of watermelon. Well, he actually ate about 9, and those are just the ones that I gave him. Every time I turned around he was grabbing a piece out of the garbage and finishing it off. Whatever. It kept him quiet so I really didn't care (and I knew that I would aready be dealing with the diaper the next day anyway........).

The sun started to set and the wind picked up again. I was visiting w/ another couple that we had just met and noticed Ludwiga had taken Jacob inside. She had asked me if we had any dry clothes for him......I did, but didn't have a chance to put them on him yet. She was being very sweet and because I wasn't her kid, she couldn't really say "get these wet clothes off this cold child...now!!" (which she should have--because he was getting cold). Instead she just took him inside and when he reappeared he was GERMAN. A friend of hers had given her some Lederhosen and it was all she had to put on him. The sweet blue shirt and the shorts. After I stopped laughing.......I took him outside to take a picture. He was so proud of his new outfit he kept posing and posing. Ludwiga is from Germany and her other grandkids wear these all the time. When you come to think of it, what could be better then leather shorts? Back me up here Wendy. For some reason it just tickled me to see him in these. I guess you could call this a study in juxtaposition.

So there you have it. That is how my son came to wear lederhosen. Not a particularly funny story, but the end result made us giggle.

Next up... a hula skirt.

DUDE!!!!!

I keep meaning to get back and write the story (I am half done). I have waited so long that no matter what I put, it will not be as funny as you all are hoping to think it is. Sigh.

I have been swamped with getting ready to go. Taking pictures, editing pictures, taking more pictures, last day of school party, Africa stuff....blah, blah, blah. I will finish it tonight, but here are a few pictures to tide you over. For the grandma's.

Lauren lost tooth #2. She has ruffled teeth, just like her mamma.

Jacob is still squeezing into small spaces.

He never stops moving (the newest toy obsession is his "gun" which is really that pink toy mixer) He never puts it down. We have all be clocked in the head with his new toy.

He loves watermelon

Princess Lauren at the Golden Gate. Foggy day (as usual) but not too hot

I haven't had as many pictures of Lauren lately...I was trying to figure out why and I realized that 1) she doesn't like me to take her pictures anymore and 2) she is gone all day at school and I don't have as many chances. My goal this month is to get her on film (whether she likes it or not).

And now for something completely different......

Well, well, well. After spending three posts about a fish that was dead, then not dead, then dead again and got more attention in death then she EVER did in life...........it was time for a change.

I have a lot of exciting things about Africa to write about (I leave two weeks from tomorrow) but I wanted to put something totally different up today. I sat at my desk and I thought and I thought about what I could put that was the polar opposite of a fish funeral.........

Then it hit me.......... I know the exact thing.......


Jacob in Lederhosen (a type of German leather shorts for little boys)


Want to know WHY I have a picture of a small black child wearing German clothing? You are going to have to stay tuned for that one...........

Rest in Peace, Fairy Lu..

First, we had to make the coffin..........

This looks like a mug shot, but she was pretty sad. She was crying and crying and had just finished saying "Fairy Lu was the sweetest fish" and "If I had just taken better care of her...."

Of course we had to put hearts all over it......

Putting the deceased in the coffin. Lauren was sobbing and managed to squeak out "Man, she sure stinks!"

You might think she is kissing the coffin, but she is SMELLING it. Just to see how much it stinks..... silly girl

Digging a hole in just the right place (aka..the only place that isn't going to be bricked over in the new few weeks)

Lauren made a grave marker (which we later laminated)

A few words and prayer for our beloved Fairy Lu (so beloved we often forgot to feed her...)

After we put Lulu down to bed, we heard little steps on the stairs. We watched her pick some flowers from the front yard and put them on her grave. Poor Lauren.

It's in the air...

There is nothing better than springtime in my house. As I sit here in the kitchen I can smell the honeysuckle and jasmine on soft breeze that comes through the door. Ahhh. Spring. There is nowhere on earth better then right here in the spring.

Part 3 of the Fairy Lu story (oh, and BTW...Derek thinks it is Lu and not Lou) is coming up. It is called "Fairy L(o)u, the Funeral"

Also, the 8th person in three days just told me she is going to have a baby (all first babies). They are all due in the same week of December/January. It really IS in the air. One of those people is my sister in law. Yipppeee. I am blessed with wonderful nieces and nephews on my side, but this is the first on Derek's side. The best part is that they live right here. We are so happy for our kids to have cousins that live close by. Congratulations to all the expecting mammas.

P.S. I am supposed to do that 7's thing..I am working on it.

It is my sad duty to inform you that Fairy Lou, the fish who lived, has now passed away thus proving the fact that if you talk about something really cool...the opposite will immediately happen. I as much as cursed her by telling the story. Sadly, it is for real this time (I think, but you can be sure that I didn't do ANYTHING for at least a day). She is currently waiting for her coffin to be made so she can be buried....there will be no flushing of this fish according to my daughter. I did compromise on the coffin because she wanted to to keep the fish in the water in the tank it so she "could look at Fairly Lou anytime".

Ummm, no.

Poor poor Fairy Lou. We brought her back just to kill her again. Sheesh.

The fish who lived.........

Sorry it has been awhile since I have posted. I have been in the outside world actually DOING things. :-) We have been cleaning out closets, moving furniture and generally getting the house de-junked. I tend to keep things that I don't need. Little did I know on Memorial Day that we would be the beneficiaries of a miracle.

Let me back up. A few weeks ago I was cleaning the kitchen counter and looked at Fairy Lu's very dirty fish tank (for those of you who don't know...Fairy Lou is the fish that we bought after Lauren's beloved Great Grandma died ON HER BIRTHDAY!!). I am talking "so much algae that you can barely see the fish" dirty. She didn't seem to mind and in fact I think she was thriving..these fish do live in the rice paddies....there must be mud there. This is actually Fairy Lu 5. The first 4 died within hours or days of being introduced to their new home. We felt that Lulu was traumatized enough w/ death so we ran out and bought NEW fish. Do you know how hard it is to find a Beta that is the same color as the one you had before? I think Lauren's Uncle Jay even went out to Petsmart in the late hours of the night to get one. One even died while my sister and I were sitting and looking at it....it was slowly swimming in circles and then ... blub, blub, blub...belly up on the top of the tank. So, Fairy Lou 5 has been doing great and has lasted for about 6 months. While cleaning the counter, I noticed that Fairy Lou looked a bit sluggish. About an hour later I noticed that she was floating on the top of the tank. Belly up.

Crap.

I made an executive decision that pet disposal and/or breaking the bad news fell into the realm of what Daddy's do. I put a dish cloth on the tank (a shroud?) and called my husband. Oh, I want to point out as well that Derek was tired of the dirty tank and decided to clean it out. I didn't want to tempt fate and it turned out I was right. The unfortunate demise of Fairy Lou was just a week after the tank was cleaned. I put the tank on the back porch and left it up to him. Derek thought that Lauren might want to say "good by" to the fish and be there when she went to the great toilet bowl in the sky. He got home really late from work the next few nights so it just never happened. The tank remained on the back porch, covered. Lauren never even noticed that the tank was gone (out of sight, out of mind?).

Memorial Day, Derek decided that it was a good day to tell Lu about the fish. He went to the back porch to get the little tank. A few seconds later I hear the loudest yell and then laughing I have ever heard.

"She's not dead!!!"

?????????????????????

"Are you sure...are you SURE it isn't just the water in the tank moving that makes you think she is alive..it has been A WEEK" I answer.

And as proof he held up the tank and sure enough, there was Fairy Lou swimming back and forth. Alive as you and me. Is it a miracle? Is that fish just a really good actor? Should we check for a small lightning shaped scar on its little fish forehead? It it because I made the Lord Voldemort joke about Cubby? Maybe Cubby really IS he who can not be named. :-)

Either way...Fairy Lou the fish came back to us. The tank went right back onto the counter where it usually goes and a few minutes later and Lulu, who never even noticed that the tank was missing, asked "Mom, can I feed Fairy Lou".

True Story.

Picture this...

Tracey at Picture This was talking yesterday about the 'blurries' that sometimes happen when trying to get a nice photo with the flash turned off. She asked readers to share a photo they think 'worked' even with some blur. I thought of a few that I have taken. I am going to post them so she can see them.....I don't know how to do it any other way...

I like both of these because I think that the blur shows the motion in the picture.
Cubby having a tantrum....

This is my favorite picture of my husband and my son. This was taken right after Derek walked off the stage at his graduation from Stanford. He took the kids with him (they all do it there) and he just smacked Cubby on the cheek. It is blurry b/c I took it fast, but it works.

A great story is on the way about Fairy Lou, the miracle fish.

Read it here first...

Hey everyone,

A friend of mine is bringing her little girl home from Ethiopia any day now. The catch is that this girl is HIV positive. Both Ethiopia and the US have started to allow HIV positive children to be adopted. This is great news. Did you know that HIV is not a fatal illness in children in the US, but it is in Africa? Why? Proper nutrition, drugs and health care. It is a shame to let those kids die in orphanages when some families here are willing to adopt them. Thanks to places like the Gates Foundation and the One campaign...these children are starting to get the meds they need to survive. They are even going to school and expected to live into adulthood. That is a very different story then it was a few years ago. BUT, there is always more that can be done. No amount of money or schooling can replace a mom and a dad.

This story is cool because this family adopted a son (not HIV positive) from Ethiopia a few years ago. They decided to sponsor an HIV positive child too (those kids at the time couldn't be adopted). They decided to meet their sponsored child when they went over to pick up their son. They fell in love with her, a young girl named Desta. They have fought long and hard to bring her home. If you have a minute to read a new blog, check out Bringing Desta Home at http://bringingdestahome.blogspot.com/ People magazine sent a reporter over there with them so you will hear about it soon anyway. Desta is now 11. It is a very compelling story.

Another friend of mine visited the same orphanage (AHOPE for Children) when she was over getting HER son. She also fell in love with a little girl and decided to sponsor her too. Now they are bringing her home as soon as they can. Isn't that wonderful? I know that not all of us are equipped to adopt HIV positive children, but isn't it great that for the ones who can, it is now possible for them to find a forever family? What a blessing. I can't adopt an HIV positive child, but I can sponsor one (or get my family to pitch in and sponsor one). I can gather donations for the AHOPE orphanage. There are families from all over the US going to Ethiopia to pick up their children every week and they often bring donations to AHOPE. If I find the stuff, they will find a way to get it over there. I can do something, all of us can. It isn't hard and it isn't even very expensive.......20$ goes a long way over there. Just a thought.

Ok, I am off the soapbox. At the very least it is interesting reading for the evening. Here are some links. You can leave Desta a message on the comments for her to get when she gets home. I know they are keeping a book for her of all the well wishes.

Have a good day!

http://www.ahopeforchildren.org/

http://www.chancesbychoice.org/

P.S. This was a nice contrast the hell that was play group at my house today......will my boy ever stop hitting?

The Dark Lord...

Some of you many not find my son's nickname funny, but it has less to do with his pigment then his unique ability for destruction (although it does add a more realistic air........Especially since he wears his Darth Vader mask all the time).

He may not make it through the summer. Yesterday alone he almost fell off the second floor balcony (apparently his head CAN still fit through the railing), he slipped out the front door and ran out behind Derek's car AS HE WAS BACKING UP (apparently he CAN open doornobs now) and then climbed on the sink and managed to open a bottle of Ambien and take one or twelve (apparently he CAN climb onto the counter of the bathroom--but that one was on Derek's watch....not TOTALLY my fault). Then last night as I was trying to read an e mail for about 12 seconds, he pushed a chair up to the kitchen counter and grabbed Lauren's codine for her pneumonia. He is DETERMINED to kill himself. Seriously.

Reading this could lead one to assume that I am a terrible mother with drugs just laying around all over the house. That is only kind of true. I am a pretty vigilant mommy. The kids aren't usually out of my eyesight. Darth Vader is just lightning quick and is smarter then I thought. That should be a thing that makes me proud, but right now it just makes me tired.

Tonight, my sister Kate had Lauren in her room. Lauren was helping her clean it. Lauren. Cleaning someone else's room. I could try and take credit for her helpful attitude and say that it was because of the The Last Resort but really Kate told her she could keep all the money she found on the floor. Anyway, Cubby was left alone in the living room for 2 minutes. Maybe less.

When the overwhelming smell of lotion hit my nose I knew I was in trouble.

Thats right folks. Lotion. This was a rookie mistake. I don't know where he got it, but I should have known better. I suppose it is my fault for teaching him how to lotion his own hair. I put some in his hands and let him rub it in. This has made him obsessed with all things lotion. I will let you imagine how much lotion was in his hair. Lets just say, we won't be greasing it for awhile...and we might actually have to wash it with shampoo. Also, I do not keep him looking like a ghetto baby (meaning..no clothes...just a diaper). I had just changed him and was going to put his jammies on him.

I am not sure which is more alarming..the lotion or the scissors. Notice that he didn't just squirt the lotion. He took the cap off. That child could take the cap off a Chapstick before he was one. Rookie mistake.

Also, I had the Stanley Steamer guys here THREE DAYS AGO. Sigh. 200$ down the drain. That little stinker. I could have saved us all some trouble and NOT had the floors steamed and spent the $$ on a really cute skirt that I saw at JJill.

UPDATE.........

While I was writing this I had the lotion monster in his bed. I actually sent him up to his crib with my sister while I cried for a little while. I forgot to remind her to put something on him before she put him in bed. Why? Diapers don't stay on long in this house w/ out at least three layers on top. When he was still crying an hour later I decided to investigate. Let's just say the smell hit me before I got up the stairs.

Oh the horror of a room covered in poo. Enough said.

I wish there was a Last Resort for babies.................I guess this is why going to to rural Africa is going to be less of a working trip and more of a vacation.........

Local Boy Wins...

For all you Amazing Race fans!!

Hurray for BJ and Tyler. Tyler is from Woodside.....the town right next to my little town. His dad, Jamis, owns the resturaunt called Bucks (in the late 90's it was THE place for tech deals to happen over breakfast). Derek and I had our first date at Bucks. We also met Shirly Temple Black and Joan Biaz there once, they weren't together but they are locals. Jamis is a wacky, artist type and his kids are very intelligent free spirits. Tyler is his middle son and his youngest son is my youngest brother in law's best friend. A few years ago Tyler made a movie by walking from the bottom of Japan to the top. He does stuff like that. Amazing Race was nothing.

It couldn't have happened to a nicer guy (and I am glad it wasn't those d%#@ frat boys!!)

Welcome to "The Last Resort" - we hope you enjoy your stay

Hello world,

This week has been one of the most difficult of my parenting career. Not because of the foot, or the heat (and the pool is still empty...PEOPLE!! That is why we pay one million dollars in HOA dues.....) or even the stinker (aka Cubby). It is because my 6 year old is winning the battle of control of the house. It perplexes me.

I am a STRICT mom. Fair, but strict. I don't let these kids get away with much. Just ask my mom and several of my friends, they think I might be a little bit TOO strict. I just feel that there is behavior that is unacceptable and it doesn't matter if you are 2 or 20, I won't allow it. Ever. Things like being unkind, impolite or sassy. Things like being disrespectful to others, taking things that aren't yours. The basics. It doesn't matter that my 18 month old doesn't REALLY understand that he is not allowed to take another child' s toy away (I know it is a development thing). Each and every time he does it, he will be walked over to the other child, give back the toy and give a "soft touch" (a pat on the arm or head). EVERY TIME. At some point he will understand and it will just have always been that way. A phrase that is often used in my home is "try again". We also do the "one, two, three" method with my daughter. After the third chance she is OUT. Sometimes she gets three chances in a row, for example.

"Lu, it is time for bed"

"But MOM!!"

"That's one"

"MOM!"

"That's two"

...and if she makes it to three; things will be very grim (no song, no stories, etc). Sometimes it is over the course of a day. For example, hitting her brother....if I have to get to three by the end of the day, then things are REALLY grim. It works too. I have found that it allows me to discipline while being unemotional. If I get worked up, we loose ground very quickly. She knows the rules and she knows what is expected of her and if she does the wrong thing...well, the rules are clear. This has been very effective ever since she was small. That was yesterday. Now she is almost 6 and the rules have changed. Basically, I don't make the rules or hold the power anymore.

I have always struggled with 6 year old girls. Sorry. They are awkward and silly, too big to be little and too little to be big. I kind of dreaded this age anyway. I would take my then three year old to the park and watch the older girls and dread the day she became one. I didn't know that 6 would be so HARD. I joke that it is just a fun preview for 13, and I am sure it is, but I am amazed at how one (small) person can set the mood in our home.

Lately, Lu has decided that the rules in our home are optional and that it doesn't matter the consequence that is given, being sassy or having the last word is more important. Going to bed early? Oh well. No TV or computer? Who cares, she'll just draw. No snacks? She didn't want one anyway. The other night, she was in bed early and she actually GOT UP and went outside to play in the back yard. I had to physically carry her back in. Clearly, the key to discipline is that the consequence has to be more uncomfortable then the behavior (although..someday I am told they will want to be good for the sake of being good....I am skeptical). That seems to be the missing key. I found myself constantly yelling at her and having to be louder and longer as the week progressed. Short of physically punishing her (which I am not totally opposed to, but this was not the correct solution here) I didn't know what to do. Every interaction we had was negative...and we had to interact 300,000 times a day. It made our house feel like a dark cloud was hanging over it all the time. I was cranky and at the end of my rope all the time. Frankly, I was battle weary in a way I hadn't been since she was two. I dreaded getting up in the morning.

I came to the realization that the balance of power needed to shift in a BIG way. She needed to understand that I was in charge and that I wouldn't tolerate this anymore. BUT, I needed to do it in a way that would allow me to discipline her w/ out high emotion but make it consistent too. Sounds like a challenge, huh? I borrowed an idea from the sister of my friend Suzi.

Welcome to "The Last Resort".

What is the Last Resort? One morning last week (when it was only 8:30 and we had already had multiple fights), I decided that she wasn't going to get to have ANYTHING in her room. Nothing but a bed (and I let her keep the pink sheets and not put the white ones on...that is the last resort at the Last Resort).

We moved EVERY SINGLE thing out of her room. All the posters on the wall, all the toys, all the books, all the clothes. EVERYTHING. She has to earn them back. It is nice to have such a clean room. See the pink shelf that used to be full of books, Barbies and Polly Pockets? Gone.

See the desk that used to have paper, crayons, markers and glue. Empty (I even took the chair) and I put them in the closet where the door will remain shut.

All her clothes are gone too (I put mine in her closet and hers in mine). She has to ask me if she wants to change and I get to decide what she will wear...instead of the usual, one-of-us-picks-the-top-and-the-other-picks-the-bottom (to make sure she semi matches). The best part is that I made her do it. I got a bunch of baskets and told her to fill them up and put them in her brother's room. She had to be the little pack horse and believe me, she was crying the whole time. It really made it hit home for her. She was even late for school b/c she was taking so long.

I know this seems drastic and it is, but without relaying the play by play, it was necessary.

The result? We are on day three and it is working. Every minute of the day is spent w/ Lauren trying to do things to earn stuff back. She keeps saying "isn't it great how happy I am being?" "Isn't it wonderful that I am playing with Jacob?" You know what? It IS!!! Instead of us focusing all day on the bad things that are happening, she is fixated on the good. She has already earned back her radio (so she can listen to music at night) and her pretty pillows for her bed (she IS my daughter after all.....home decor is very important). Tomorrow might be the chair for her desk, or the Polly's. We will see.

Harmony is restored, we are having loving words again and I am slowly editing the toys (she will never know). The Last Resort just might have saved our summer.

Of chocolate pretzels and Pirate's Booty

America, I may not make it.

While trying to accomplish the joke that is "staying off my foot" I have done the following things.
1. Done sharing time for Jr. and Sr. Primary
2. Taken Jacob for a surgery
3. Taken Jacob for follow up after surgery
4. Had 3 photo appointments (one was a baptism...Couldn't reschedule)
5. Made an emergency run to Trader Joe's for Unburied Treasure Popcorn and chocolate covered pretzels. These are the only thing that will get me through the week. For those of you w/out a Trader Joes' these are like cheese puffs but they look and taste like popcorn. They melt in your mouth, are perfect for pre chewing toddlers and are my version of crack cocaine.

Not too bad. I have been doing the best I can, but some stuff just can't be rescheduled (like Jacobs surgery.....). My kids are actually driving me nuts (which isn't really surprising because none of us have left the house). I am surprised it took this long for us all to start being irritated with each other. It isn't the little one that I am struggling with, it is the 6 year old. I didn't know that 6 would be so hard. Really. I know that most of it is because I am not feeling on top of things so I am not the most kind and patient mother this week, but seriously...she gets to LEAVE. She should be the happiest one. We are in the middle of clothes battles, food battles and back talk battles. All at the same time. I am also fully aware that they aren't acting any different, I am. That isn't really helping though. Don't let that cute smile fool you. Under those little piggytail's is a child that wants to dress like a Bratz doll, eat nothing but taco chips and tell her mother what she will and will not do. Both kids have been in bed by 6:30 pm this week. I can only get away with this until they understand the concept of time.


The baby is bitter that I have installed a new gate to keep him out of the kitchen (he finally figured out the sliding pocket door....darn it). The kitchen is my oasis and the children are not allowed in unless I say so. The biggest key to being allowed in the kitchen is to be old enough not to get into the kitchen stuff or make me have to babyproof it. I don't want to. The end. The whole toe disaster started because Cubby was getting into something he shouldn't have. I know it would be easier to babyproof the kitchen, but I prefer to buy a gate. This one has bars and he can push things through it. Yesterday he found a magazine and tore each page off, one by one, and pushed them through the bars...........calling "ma ma, ma ma, ma ma" the whole time. America, I didn't budge. I can't keep him from jumping on my foot so he has to stay one one side of the bar and me on the other. I just handed him a pile of magazines and told him to go to it.

Anytime I come near the gate, he holds his hand out like he is trying to flag down a life boat to get off the Titanic. Mostly he forgets he is supposed to be crying and he just watches Go Diego Go. He is currently throwing all his toys over the gate. Too bad for him when all the fun things to play with are on MY side of the gate. Should I play with them in front of him and see how mad he can REALLY get? (just kidding..........)

I will make it until Derek gets home on Saturday night, right? Of course, he leaves again on Sunday night.............

Because I don't get enough attention....

Have you ever had one of those weeks when there is a 50% / 50% chance that things can go either good OR bad and you always hit the bad? Not really bad stuff, but just little annoying life stuff. For example...you come in the door and set the diaper bag on a chair. If you are having a good week, it will stay there. If you are having a bad week it will teeter on the edge, topple on to the floor and the sippy cup of milk inside it will explode.

Or.

You are on the phone with a client and you need to go get your 5 year old from the bus stop and you cut it really close. If you are having a good week, the bus will be a little bit late, but if you are having a bad week, it was 5 minutes early and has already taken your daughter back to school....which means you have to wake the baby up from his nap to go get her.

Yeah. That was my week.

In keeping with the flow of the week.....I was chasing my son and smacked my foot on the edge of the high chair. I heard a SNAP and then collapsed b/c of the pain. I even swore (which my son helpfully mimicked). I knew I had broken a toe. Now, I have broken a toe before and I know there is really nothing that you can do. So I taped it and ignored it. But, because I was having a "bad" week it got worse and worse. Finally when it was so swollen I was a little nervous and even a passing breeze made me wince in pain I went to the Dr. and got an x-ray. It showed that I had broken it right on the joint and need to to be "immobile" for the next 4 weeks or I will need surgery to put a pin in it. (So much fuss for a toe?). I was laughing so hard I think I actually snorted. Did I need to mention that I have TWO kids and a husband that will be in New York for three of the next four weeks? If I don't stay off it after all that time, I will have to have the surgery anyway......

Great.

So, if anyone wants to come over and feed me peeled grapes while they chase my kids and do my laundry, the key is under the mat. Otherwise, I will let you know when the surgery is............

My favorite picture..

This is my friend Katie and her little girl Emmy.

I think this has to be the best picture I have ever taken (or my favorite anyway). I am just a little bit bummed that it wasn't of one of my kids. But then again, my kids would never be that still and calm...and they would be reaching for the camera.

Ever since I was a little girl I always wanted to adopt a child and I always wanted a red headed child. Whenever I see that ginger hair I get just a bit wistful because that isn't really in the cards now. My sister in law has red hair, so I might luck out with a niece or nephew.........one can only hope.

Yellow Fever...

No, I didn't get yellow fever in story #2 (but that would have been cool, eh?)

I had to get my shots for Africa today. Beyond the fact that I am a giant baby, they HURT. Also, I got many different kinds of live virus injected into my body. The worst one is yellow fever...Apparently it makes lots of people sick.

But don't worry, only 12 percent of those that get sick from the shot experience total organ failure and die.

12%?????????????

Baby Ben...

Story #2 is coming...

I took pictures of two little boys today. They are the children of my good friend here in Palo Alto. The older one, Nathan, is the Sunbeam in my story last year that refused to let me tell the story of Jonah--he kept bringing it back to Nemo and demonstrated speaking whale. This is the same kid that could sing every Primary song and tell you every scripture story his first week in Sunbeams. Very sweet and very smart.

Nathan also happens to be the subject of one of my favorite Jacob stories. When Cubby was only a few weeks old, I brought him with me to my Sunbeams class. The kids were interested in him and all took turns touching him. Nathan kept rubbing Cubby's head and finally he looked up at me and said "Sister Bingham, he looks JUST like my baby Ben". FYI, he looks NOTHING like his baby Ben (white hair, blue eyes). He said it with such vehemence and was so earnest. I will never forget the look on his face.

This is a picture of Cubby and "baby" Ben. Jacob just started going to Nursery and the very first day Ben literally grabbed him by the hand and stayed with him the whole day. They were either holding hands or playing together the whole time. Occasionally Cubby would lean over and give him a kiss (and he didn't even do that "kiss that turns into a bite" thing he pulls on me). I just love this picture because I think that it reminds me of their little relationship.

Story #1

Have you ever wondered what it would smell like if you walked into a room that had a dead person under the bed that had been there awhile, then it rained and flooded the building but nobody bothered to clean up or remove the carpet, then another person died under the bed, then someone cooked garlic and curry in the room and served it to a dog that puked it all up and then peed all over the entire room? If you have, go to the Cadillac Motel in Lovelock, Nevada. Ask for room 6.

The kids and I headed out of SF on Thursday afternoon and made pretty good time. We didn't even stop for meals...we just kept on going. The kids were troopers (the DVD player helped) and we didn't have to make 8,000 stops for the bathroom. I knew we wanted to get farther then Reno (where we usually stay the night at Circus Circus) but wasn't sure if we could make it all the way to Elko. We got just outside of Reno and the kids started to loose it. I decided we would stay at the next big town, Lovelock. I called ahead and found that almost every room in town was booked (huh? there is nothing there.....) but a place called the Cadillac Inn had a room for $35. That should have been my first clue.

We pulled into the motel parking lot and saw 8 small buildings that were surrounding a small plot of land (more about that later). In the lobby, a 1,000 year old man checked us in. No computer, just filled out a piece of paper that had my license plate number on it. Names aren't important in a small town like Lovelock (whose theme is incidentally "lock your love in Lovelock".....does that make sense to anyone?). We walked toward the little room across the parking lot. On the way the owner pointed to the plot of land in the middle and informed me that it was the town's Chinese cemetery. He also told me that they had just celebrated "Ching Ming" (I'm not making fun, I swear that is exactly what he said) or Chinese Memorial Day. He also invited me to visit the Frank M. Chang museum of Chinese History, open 24 hours a day, in Room 2. (this intrigued me on so many levels...were people staying in Room 2 and you just said "excuse me, I wanted to see the museum" or did he sacrifice 1/8 of his income to dedicate the room to Mr. Chang? Intrigued, I tell you). I asked him why there were so many Chinese people in the town; had they come when the railroad was built?" Remember, this town is TINY and in the middle of nowhere. They have exactly one McDonald's, one bar and one gas station. TINY. It was hard to imagine anyone living there, let alone any kind of minority ethnic group. He told me that no, they hadn't come with the railroad, they were just always there. Hmmm. I am pretty sure that they weren't "always" there, what with it being in the middle of nowhere and all, but I can't imagine what else would have brought them to this town. In fact, I can't imagine what brought ANYONE to this town. I will need to do some more research on that one.

He handed me the key and by the time I had opened the door to the car, he was gone, the lights were off in the lobby and the sign on the door said closed. I pulled the kids out of the car and opened the door. That is when the special smell I described above hit me. I dry heaved, just a little bit. Well, a lot. I looked at Lauren and she looked at me and we bravely went in. I figured that the room had been closed up for awhile, so I opened all the windows and the door, I lit a few matches and sprayed perfume. I figured it would air out in a few minutes while I unloaded the car. I sniffed around the room and didn't find any wet patch of carpet or a place that was stronger then others (like, for instance, under the bed where there could be a decomposing body). I was hoping it was just a room that hadn't been opened for a few months.

I dropped the kids on the bed and unloaded. After 10 minutes, the smell was not getting much better. The only thing that had changed was that the room was much colder and there was a top note of smoke and a bottom note of perfume. By this time it was 11:00 pm, I was beat and the kids were zombies. I figured I would just put them to bed and we would all go to sleep--you can't smell in your sleep, right? If I sprayed enough perfume and lit enough matches, eventually the smell of perfumy smoke would overpower it, right? We all jumped into bed and turned the lights off. It got WORSE...is that possible? If you were very, very still it was tolerable, but if you moved your head at all you got a little bit of a whiff and the dry heaving started again. (Let me take a minute to tell you that I have been accused of having bat senses by my husband. I am what is called a "super smeller". I smell EVERYTHING even when others can't. Pregnancy was a treat). I was kind of hoping that it was just me that was so bothered. The kids didn't seem to be too bugged by it. I just tried to go to sleep.

After about 15 minutes Lauren poked me in the arm and said "mom, if you just put your nose under your shirt and smell your breath it isn't as bad". That was when I decided that we needed to go. Then next town was over an hour away and I was tired. What to do? I decided that instead of ending up like the last 12 minute of every horror movie ever made (surely there was a dead body in there somewhere) I decided to split. I dumped everything in the car and headed over to the office. The guy eventually opened (believe me...I was NOT leaving until I had talked to him). He acted like I had told him there was a three headed monkey living under the bed. "Smell? what? I didn't smell anything? No one else has complained." End result--he wouldn't give me my money back. Honestly. Rather then fight and possibly kill someone over 35$ (wouldn't THAT be a good Dateline?) I just left. We peeled out of town and left Lovelock in our rear view mirror. I truly hope people do more then lock their love in Lovelock. I hope they lock their smelly, disgusting motels with their history museums and dead people under the bed. Lets leave all that stuff in Lovelock, shall we?

Since it was over 100 miles to the next town I stopped at the gas station and bought a six pack of Coke (I needed the sugar AND the caffeine to keep me awake), a dozen Krispy Kreme's and headed across the desert. The good news is that you can drive as fast as you want in the desert at night (I didn't even let those crosses on the side of the road marking where previous drivers had died bother me). The kids were covered in donut glaze and crumbs by the time we got to Winnemucca and crawled into the first motel (a Holiday Inn Express, very nice--good breakfast). The lady on the desk felt so bad for me she gave me the government rate without me even asking for it. I tell you, show up at a hotel in the middle of the night with sticky, crying children and looking like hell warmed over and it can really save you some money! :-)

We eventually got to sleep; but not before Jacob fell off the bed twice, the people in the next room watched Letterman so loud they could hear it in Lovelock and Lauren cracked her head on the dresser. I was looking forward to a long sleep and felt certain that the kids would sleep in. I gave up on that notion at exactly 5:47 am the next day. How do my children live on such little sleep? We ate the free breakfast and headed out the door again.........

Stay tuned for part 2 (AKA "Just because you leave at the crack of dawn does NOT mean that you will arrive at your destination early")

We are home!!!

Whew,

We spent 10 days in Utah. I drove the kids out by myself (an adventure...but not because of the kids). I met lots of blog friends and took TONS of pictures. Thanks to all who helped out. I am editing like crazy and should have them all up in the next few days.

In the grand tradition of having drama come to us in spades...here is a quick recap of the last week. We got stuck in a blizzard coming over Donner's (yes, in April) and rushed straight to the ER, where Lulu was diagnosed with pneumonia. We had a birth mother on deck that was planning on placing her baby with us, the baby was due today and she had it yesterday, at the last minute she decided to parent (such a familiar story now). This was one more "sure thing" (the birthmom was 12, birthdad 13..the state was going to take the baby away..at the last minute her step parents decided to take custody). That was sad. At least this time we found out she decided to parent BEFORE we flew out.

I will fill in the details in a few days--after the pneumonia goes away.

Soon, soon, soon.....

Happy Anniversary..

This is a big week in our family.

Lots of things happen to us in the first week of April (we got engaged, we closed on our house...) but there are two new very important dates for us this time. One is a big day for Jacob.....we finalized his adoption one year ago. That is the special anniversary of his legal day. He had already be ours for 6 months, but it was nice to have it all legal (I hate this picture of me...my gut......BUT, to be fair, I had just lost an almost second trimester pregnancy two days earlier...my body still thought it was pregnant....I am going to have to airbrush that......) . This is us with the judge that finalized the adoption. Jacob just wanted to rip his glasses off his face the whole time we were taking this picture.

The other date is special for our whole family. We were all sealed together as a family one year ago too. This is our new family anniversary that we will celebrate every year. It works because my daughter had the nerve to be born on our ACTUAL anniversary so that day is all about her birthday. It was pretty powerful to mark the new addition to our life by being sealed together. For those of you reading that that don't know what having a child sealed to you is...it is basically like another wedding ceremony but it is for the whole family, it is the religious ceremony that seals the new (adopted) child to your family. It was in the temple (our highest house of religious worship) and all our family and friends were there. Many of the same people that had been there when Derek and I were sealed (married). I remember looking at the faces of my two little kids and thinking how blessed we were to be their parents.

So Happy Anniversary to us. I told the kids that THEY were in charge of planning the party this year.....I hope they take us to a fancy dinner..................

I hate to say it....

but the show on VH1 called So NoTORIous is hi-freaking-larious. Really.

And I am not even embarassed to say it.

A few samples...

These are a few of the pictures

I have taken so far from people

who signed up for the fundraiser

photoshoots. I love shooting kids!

I did 4 sessions at the beach today

so I will have some good ones from that, too.