Friday, April 04, 2008

Good one...

I remember when I thought newborns were hard. Back in the day when I had ones that would EAT!! :-)

I keep meaning to get on here and post, but then I don't. Either I am too tired, too busy dealing with older kids that are trying to adjust (and this manifests itself in the form of wanting to be held-Cubby, throwing tantrums-Norah or being a sassy pants--Lu), eating or feeding someone. I had taken some really fun and good pictures of the baby, but they are on my phone and I haven't taken the time to figure out how to download them yet. Nor have I managed to gather my thoughts. Or get dressed. You know how it goes.

So, I will recap the week in list form. Forgive me, but this is the best I can do.

--Doctors. I have spent an average of 2 hours per day at the doctor. Between the two girls, there is A LOT to do. Grace Ace hasn't yet regained her birth weight and she yo yo's between staying steady and loosing weight. Feeding her is a full time job. I am SO glad that I am not breastfeeding. I had decided not to before she was born, but this cements it. Sometimes it takes her an hour to get an ounce down. She needs to have 12-14 ounces a day. You do the math. This is also why I have full time child care. Next week we start the therapies (there are meetings w/ social workers, infant development specialists, audiologists, optometrists, etc, etc, for both girls...). At least I get out of the house.

--Trying to get my milk to dry up was the WORST part of the whole process. It hurts and apparently, my body really wants to make milk. Lots of it. If anyone you know decides to go this route, let me know. The lactation consultant gave me bad advice and made things worse, but she gave me really great advice about helping the baby eat and finding the right bottle for her little mouth, so they aren't all bad. Don't get me started about the nurses at the hospital and the whole breastfeeding thing. My life, my body, my kid, my boobs, my sanity. My choice. I know that some of my readers have very strong opinions about this subject. Great. If you were here to wet nurse for me, all the better, but this subject is one that I am very happy to defend myself on, but probably won't, because I am too tired.

--Ace's blood count came back funny. Children with Trisomy 21 (the real name for Down Syndrome) have a much higher chance of getting certain kinds of leukemia. We had to retest her blood. It took forever and they kept having to prick her heel over and over. I hate that part. Lucky for me they had lots of lollipops in their basket, I keep feeding them to Norah. She was pretty unhappy that they were making her baby cry.

--Speaking of Norah and sugar. Guess who hasn't really gained any weight and is back on the official "failure to thrive" list and force feeding program? That's right. The difference is that before she really didn't eat. It was a challenge just to get the food into her. Now, she eats all the time and she eats A LOT. But, I have to get more calories into her. We have smoothies made w/ cream and ice cream twice a day, she gets all the sugar she wants (empty calories, I know but they are still calories..), etc. I honestly spend much of my day getting my two girls to eat. Ironic for a mother that LOVES to eat, eh? I don't know if N has a super high metabolism or if this is part of what is wrong with her. I am anxious for the development center to get started on these tests. There is no way that a child that is eating as much as she is, isn't gaining weight. Well, I mean, clearly she isn't but there must be a better reason than the fact that she isn't eating enough, because she is. She still isn't walking, but we are working on it. We have added a few words too, so we are slowly, slowly making progress.

--Lauren thinks that she is 18. She also manages to put together outfits that make he look like a Bratz doll. She has such a unique sense of style and puts together some really cool outfits, but occasionally they get a little heavy on the fishnets (she got them from MY drawer) and boas and corsets (she made one for herself out of felt and yarn..I am not kidding). I have had to come down really hard on her to not parent everyone, including me. I can do nothing right when it comes to the baby, according to her, and she is really hard on Jacob. Mostly, I need to teach her that she doesn't have to worry about anyone but herself. I know this is a coping mechanism for her and a way to impose order in her life, but she needs to chill out or she is going to have a stroke at 11. I have caught her packing to run away a few times. The last time, I saw the suitcase and said "are you running away?" and she looked at me and said "I am afraid it is true this time". Classic. I laughed. I tried so hard not to..but I couldn't help it.

--Jacob is getting better in terms of not destroying things. I love, love, love this house. I love the yard and the little family room nook. He can play and putter and go in and out without too much work. The kids call the nanny flat "the hotel". Right now, they get rewarded for good behaviour by getting to play in the Hotel. Yay. He and Norah have done pretty well sharing a room. Occasionally Norah will cry a bit before she sleeps. Jacob will lay on his bed, with his fingers in his ears, shouting "I HATE this song" over and over. My kids are pretty funny. Other than the fact that he asks me for food ALL DAY LONG (but he is able to access lots of healthy snacks on his own) over and over and over again, things are OK. Having a new minivan with a DVD player in it helps too. He loves to sit in the car and watch movies. I love that he is strapped in. Everyone wins..

Finally, this weekend is the 11th anniversary of the day my husband and I got engaged (he reminded me). It has been a tricky year. My mom is coming to town to help with the baby (her original due date was a few days ago). Derek and I are going to have a fancy dinner and stay at a hotel. To sleep. Where no one can interrupt us. That is what 4 kids does to you. You are excited about a hotel for the food you don't have to make and for the 12 hours of sleep you will get. I can't imagine anything better at this point.

I have so many posts in my head that are about intellectual things or pop culture things. I have some thoughts on Top Chef, on how much I hate that the women of America crucified Eliot Spitzers wife (this post might still get written..I am bugged about this), my obsession with The Biggest Looser, etc, etc. Someday.

Will my brain stop leaking. Will my kids ever stop fighting? Will I ever sleep again?

22 comments:

Tracy M (dandelion.mama) said...

Thanks for the update. You go and do whatever you've got to do to survive, woman!

Those babies are so lucky to have your for a Mama.

Ah, 12 hours of sleep- even now, I fantasize about it.

Anonymous said...

Spring break and I'M COMING!!! Mom's can help a little bit!!

jk

petie said...

Wow. You sound so busy. A couple of things: 1) I wish I was one of your girls and had to gain weight (which I REALLY don't), so you could make me delicious, rich, calorie-filled treats in the name of health, 2) As for the nursing thing, I'm not sure there's anything you can do about the drying up. . .other than wait. I'd be interested to know your bad advice, as I didn't receive any advice when I chose not to breast-feed Noel. It just takes a long time, is painful, and is not fun. And, my heavens. . .you enjoy those bottle feedings. Choosing to bottle/breast-feed is entirely your decision and you have enough things to worry about besides the annoying opinions of others. 3) The Biggest Loser. Let's discuss. Could I really lose 80 lbs. in 3 months? That's INSANE. And if those boys cry ONE MORE TIME, I'm going to kill them. Wusses. All of them. Go Kelly!

Holladay Family said...

Wow. That sounds like an eventful week or has it been an eventful month? Year? I like to see how other people out in the world are doing but it sounds like I need to prayer that your little ones want to eat and gain weight soon! I know how hard it is to have milk and not need it. I had twins and my milk was overflowing to say the least. I breastfeed them for 9 months and then switched to formula. Not to discourage you, because I think this is RARE, but it took me a couple of YEARS before my milk fully went aware. How terrible is that? A friend of mine said I should have taken supplements (from the Health food store) or gone to my doctor (apparently they have pills to decrease milk supply) or wrapped myself in a tight bandage. I didn't know any of that and apparently suffered unnecessarily. I am worried about your blood draw. Leukemia is not something you need to deal with right now. The Lord has given you enough. I will pray about that tonight. We can only handle so much before we need to say, I think you've trusted me enough. I hope your kiddos continue to progress and all of them begin to thrive. You are a sweet family who is trying to provide the best home possible for your little critters. I will pray that you may you sleep well and have peace in your home tonight.

Holladay Family said...

pray not prayer...just a silly typo

AzĂșcar said...

"I'm afraid it's true this time"

Oh Lu!!

That tickles me pink.

It's true: a hotel sounds like heaven, just heaven.

Dalene said...

I'm with AzĂșcar. And she made her own corset? Oh my!

Wish you the best--as always. And now I need to go Google the wife, because all I heard about was him and the call girl.

dalene said...

(I'm back. And now I'm just mad. I can't wait for your post!)

Kalli Ko said...

Since i know nothing of the nursing woes yet and of the drying up of milk supply I will go by what a friend told me she did to dry up... and that was cabbage leaves in her bra or some junk like that. I have no idea where she got it but she swore it worked. Weird huh?

SupermomE11 said...

Bek,
HUGS!!!! It makes me laugh at how similar some of our kids are... how many times have one of us told a story about Marcus or Jacob and the other one has said, "uh huh! that could be my kid!"

Your stories about Lu crack me up because that could be my Maggie. This is the girl that told me she wanted to go to Vietnam (she was born there). I asked her why, expecting to have an emotional, heart to heart about it. She put her hands on her hips and said, "Mom! I am the princess from Vietnam. They are my people. They want to see me." Indeed!!!

hang in there... I am praying both girls will start to gain weight and thrive... I know from our early Marcus days how stressful that is. I wish you were closer and I could give you some rest. Happy anniversary and I am glad you mom is coming!!

Hugs,
E

Suzie Petunia said...

Your oldest sounds like she's going through the same stage as mine. Except mine hasn't tried to run away... yet. I'm sure that is coming. But if she does I hope she packs the mess in her room to take with her.

Good luck with the babies and all that feeding. You are doing a good job. A job that is NOT easy. I hope you enjoy your get away!

Leisha said...

I just love ya...albeit from afar. Our kids are pretty much around the same ages Newborn, 2, 4, 6...so I hear ya on a lot of what you are going through. Since the last 2 are foster-to-adopt you can replace your therapies with all the parent visits, CPS visits, yada, yada, yada. This is why I love your blog. I get good tips on how to stay sane, or just to commiserate. I'm impressed by you every post. I also like Gracie's new nickname!

La Yen said...

You rule.
Maybe, in the three steps that she took, she stepped on a tapeworm.

Or, maybe she is not eating anything at all, but storing the food in her afro-puffs for the winter.

And, if I beg, do you think Lu can make me a corset?

Nellie said...

I hate nursing, but never had the nerve not to do it at all. So, I do it for as long as I can stand and no more. My sanity is worth way more than bing a cow.

Enjoy your engagement anniversary! Sleep, and eat in peace. I agree with the Spitzer thing -- why are people so opposed to "sticking by your man?" I applaud her courage for even being there by his side. I could go on and on . . .

No, your brains will not stop leaking, but Diet coke helps. :) What is my excuse? I sleep all night most nights and my baby is three -- and my brains are pretty much all leaked out.

dresselfamily.blogspot.com said...

more than anyone i know, you need a break. actually your posted helped more than you will know. I have been whining about been tired..( Ella wakes up more than Ethan, at least 5 times a night,she's crying.

you are doing a great job!

Oh and the brest feeding stuff, i couldn't nurse the girls ( i tried, no milk, evenlactations consults told me to stop), with Ethan didn't try, and i had some stranger at the pool come up to me whilst i was feeding Ethan and said " excuse me, can u tell me why you are not BF your child".. i was so stunnd i could barely talk!!!!! HOW RUDE!!!!!!!!!!

heidi

wendy said...

Will I ever cease to be amused and entertained by you? Nope. You have a great sense of humor, especially for a mom with SO much on her plate. I think about you a lot. I hope things settle down soon, or at least that you are able to get caught up on your sleep. Hopefully that hotel trip will help!

Wendy from Flippin' Sweet

Bek said...

Aw ladies.... I find it ironic that eveyrone is saying I have a lot on my plate when I KNOW that most of you do/have more than I. Two of these commenters have 10 or more children (or really close--fingers crossed for you Wendy...).

Things are find. Another update soon.

Cafe Johnsonia said...

WOW. Bek, I'm in awe of you. You are a truly amazing woman with so many things going on. I can't even imagine. And I think I'm gonna shuddy now about my lazy little life.

WOW.

John Skiba said...

Bingham man! I got an invite from Mark Dundon's facebook page (he is clearly on steroids now) and saw the link to your blog. My wife keeps a blog going of our family and thought I would give you the link. http://theskibafamily.blogspot.com/ .

Tiffany Twisted said...

I totally hear you on all these things .. btw, congrats on the latest arrival :)

Miriam said...

So THAT's what's going on with my brains...

I'm waiting (a bit impatiently) for you and your phone to have a meeting and produce some more Ace pictures for us. But only when you feel like it!

Sleep is just so incredibly decadent right now.

KellyNello said...

Rebecca! I need to read here more often like I used to before I decided to disappear from the blogs for a while. So much has happened here since I was around last. Congrats on the new addition, for one. And for two, congrats on your ever growing cuter children!!!! I would be MORE than willing to update your banner you know.... (no charge!... cuz I'm cool like that! ;)... or you are... one of the two.) Let me know if you are wanting that.
And I'll be lurking around here again! Hope you don't mind!